Thursday, May 20, 2010

You Get What I am...

I was told I should delete yesterdays blog... No way!  You get what you get and I am who I am.  Today is a new day!

I never could figure out the statement, "Don't quit before the miracle happens".  In my acute depression the last couple days it came to me.  The miracle is another day of sobriety.  Easy!  Why the heck haven't I seen that before?  Clear as day and looking too hard.  Looking for a burning bush.  A bright light or for Bill W himself to visit and proclaim, "a spiritual experience has happened here".  A miracle has happened and I was was looking in the wrong direction!

You know, when I am depressed all I think about is drinking.  Some of that is wanting to escape reality and the terrible feelings I am experiencing.  I have gone out twice... It is much like moving to get away from your problems.  There you are... Hello! You are the problem!  The reward for drinking is simple... Prison.  Drinking removes my right of choice.  So, it is my choice today to stay out of prison!

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